Yep. You read that right. I do not want a relationship with
God. I believe God exists and I believe He is superior but I do not want a
relationship with Him. That is all too casual. I have the desire to discover God
(quite impossible considering who He is), but I do not want a relationship with
Him. I sense the urgency in growing in my walk as a Christian. I want to cling
to Christ. I want to seek His grace. I want others to seek and feel His grace.
I want to be a disciple. I want to know God and feel His presence, but I do not
want a relationship with Him.
As friendships deepen and relationships grow, we become more
comfortable with that person. I do not want to be comfortable with God. Do you even
realize who He is?? I want God to come in on an ordinary day and rock my world.
I want God to show His power and strength in every aspect of my life. I want to
sense His might and witness His grace but I do not want it to be a casual
occurrence. I do not want to be comfortable with the incredible ways that He is
constantly working around and through us. I want to be surprised and amazed by
God and His character. His holiness versus my sinfulness. His strength versus
my weaknesses. His light versus my darkness. His compassion. His mercy. His grace.
And His unrelenting love. These are not things I want to grow used to
experiencing. I want to forever be moved by God. I want God to come in and
awaken me because of who He is and the power and authority that He holds, not
because of who I- a sinner- see Him as. He is my father but because He cares,
creates and provides, not because He can be compared to a standard human
characteristic. God is not ordinary and I refuse to have a relationship with a
God I am comfortable with.
